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 Kris Swiatocho
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His Name is Bunny?
Kris Swiatocho @ Aug 25, 2010 12:32 PM
His Name
is Bunny? I have some new neighbors across my street. I know from some other neighbors that they do not know the Lord. Their home is very stressful from kids to an elderly parent living with them to a new puppy. This year they had a break in and several valuable items were stolen. Earlier this summer one of them left the out of gear and it rolled out of the drive way, hitting trash cans before stopping in the street. I've tried to get to know them, waving as I go by, dropping by and such but I have never made contact. Then the other day, their little puppy wandered in my yard. He was so playful. He quickly came up to me and allowed me to pet him. I was able to get some rope around his collar and take him back home. I knocked on the door and the lady of the home answered. I asked if she has lost this little guy and she said yes, that's Bunny, our new puppy. I was like, "Bunny???". Well that started a conversation. We weren't able to get too far but now when I wave, they wave back. I know we are going to become friends, one step at a time. Thank you Lord for YOUR ways to connect us even when OUR ways don't work. Thank you Lord when we respond and act in obedience. Thank you Lord that you are preparing those around us to receive your word, your salvation. Job 33:3 My words come from an upright heart; my
lips sincerely speak what I know. Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries YesMarketinganddesign.com NavigateConference.com (Leadership) FromHisHands.com (Silent Shopper, Greeting, First Impression Ministry) BellaJewelryDesigns.org 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10 A Penny Is Worthless
Kris Swiatocho @ Aug 25, 2010 11:31 AM
Years ago I was at a conference and
a pastor shared this story. He and his wife went out to dinner. As they
were entering the restaurant he stopped, bent down and stood back up.
His wife was like, "what's wrong"? But he just stood there, not moving.
After what seemed to be a lifetime, he turned around and told his wife
that every time he sees a penny on the ground, he stoops to pick it up
and then reads the message on the penny, "IN GOD WE TRUST." He felt that
this was one way God was speaking to him each time he saw a penny on
the ground. He said today, most people don't pick up a penny because its
worth so little. But to him, its worth is more valuable than anything
amount of currency. Each time he picks up a penny was his opportunity to
ask himself was he in fact trusting God today. Trusting HIM
with his finances, his relationship with his wife, children, family, in
his ministry, in his health, etc. As a result of this pastors message, I am now doing the same thing. Sometimes I find 3 or 4 pennies in one day. Hmmm, I guess i need to reminded over and over to trust him, to not take it back, to know His peace, His provision, and His love. So, when's the last time you saw a penny on the ground? It works with dimes, nickles and quarters too. 2 Samuel 7:28 O Sovereign LORD, you are God! Your
words are trustworthy, and you have promised these good things to your
servant. Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries YesMarketinganddesign.com NavigateConference.com (Leadership) FromHisHands.com (Silent Shopper, Greeting, First Impression Ministry) BellaJewelryDesigns.org 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
Jesus ... Single Like Me: He Knows What It Feels Like to Be Alone
Kris Swiatocho @ Aug 11, 2010 02:07 AM
Jesus ... Single Like Me: He Knows What It Feels Like to Be AloneI have tried and spent most of my life trying to do everything myself. I am the oldest of three younger brothers. When I was young, I had a father who was rarely home. So from an early age, I took on the responsibility of taking care of myself not to mention my brothers. Starting at the age of 8 I had a paper route plus other ways to make money. Not because it's good for kids to earn money, etc. but because I felt I had to, to take care of myself. This led to a pattern of self-reliance. Sure, my mom was there but she was very busy having to take care of everything in the home. She slowly designated certain activities to me as a way to help her. I quickly learned to do a lot of things on my own. I knew down deep my basic needs would be met; however if I wanted anything else, I would have to find a way to get it myself. My parents' eventual divorce only led to even more self-reliance, a journey that led toward feeling isolated. Even though my mom remarried a wonderful man, a man who brought a sense of safety into our home, I had already learned to take care of myself. I felt no one understood me. No one could really relate. No one could meet my expectations, including myself sometimes. This need to control my life, to take care of myself, was out of fear, fear of being alone. I wanted to be safe and know it would all be okay. I wanted someone else to take care of me for a change. I wanted to stop having to work so hard. I stayed weary in the fight to take care of myself. The more years that passed, the more alone I felt. Every time I had to attend another friend's wedding or get a birth announcement or hear about their move up the corporate ladder, it only emphasized my feelings of being alone. No one was there to help. No one could truly understand my pain. No one was there to take the load off. So I learned to carry the load, that is, until I met Jesus. Jesus understood what it was like to carry a heavy load. Jesus was also the first born in his family. I am sure he remembers the responsibility of taking care of his siblings, helping his parents, etc. not to mention learning a trade to help support his family. The long days of hearing his siblings cry or fuss, or his mother too tired to clean up the dishes, or his father so busy with work that he had to do some of it to help out. Jesus probably felt like I did as a child that things didn't always seem fair. Because he was fully human, I am sure he also felt alone. Jesus' understanding of being alone continued into his adult life. Jesus started his public ministry with the huge task of calling his disciples. These were men who time after time abandoned Jesus. (Luke 22:4-46). Not because they meant to hurt him, but because they were human. Most of us think of our own needs first. Due to our selfishness, we forget others who are lonely, hurting and need Jesus. Jesus had a huge task of teaching these men (and the many who followed) who he was and why he was here. He taught them a lifetime of knowledge so they would continue his ministry. What a burden on Jesus! So much to do in so little time. So much to do with men who at times forgot who he really was and why he was here. Jesus, I am sure, at times felt like no one was getting it. Was he alone in this battle, this journey? Would these people EVER get it? Do we get it? Jesus spent the last years of his life, doing whatever it took to get us to understand who he is. That he died for us. That he knows the incredible burden we feel. He may have at times felt alone, not due to him but due to his disciples (even due to us today), but he was NEVER alone. He totally relied on God for all things. He knew from the beginning that without total reliance on God, life would not have purpose. Christ came—ready to take on our load, our burden, and our sins, so that in doing this we would never be alone. Our total dependence on Christ means that you are not alone. So okay, I hear you Lord. I know I need to depend on you and not me. I know you died for me. I know you said to bring all my burdens to you, all who are heavy laden (Matthew 11:28). "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you
rest." This sounds good, Lord. But how can I just give it all to you
when I am so used to doing it all myself? How can I trust you? I mean,
Lord, do you truly understand how I feel? I am afraid, Lord. I am afraid
you will abandon me like some of my friends and family. So, you see,
it's just easier to keep doing it all myself. Then I know it will get
done. Then I can control the pain, the hurt and rejection." Jesus, as a single, as a human, as my Savior understands what feeling alone is all about. The devil tries to make us feel that WE ARE alone. But you have to keep reminding him of the truth. We ARE NOT alone. So every time you begin to feel isolated, misunderstood, and even frustrated, carry it to God. Lean on him for all things. Tell him what is going on in your life. The world can sometimes make you feel like you are alone. Maybe it's due to the truth or a lie, but no matter what we can be assured we are not alone. We have the Lord, our Savior. Thank you, Jesus. Questions for Discussion or Personal Exploration: 1. When you were young, did you ever feel alone? 2. As an adult, do you ever feel alone? How? 3. What are some positives and negatives of being alone? 4. Read and discuss John 16:32. 5. Read and discuss Matthew 9:2-13. 6. Read and discuss John 8:29. 7. Read and discuss 1 Timothy 5:5. 8. Read and discuss Matthew 28:20. Application: Start today to pray and ask the Lord to reveal his truth to you. What in your life are you not giving over to him? What are you still trying to carry yourself? Does carrying this burden create more isolation in your life? He is there, waiting to give it all to him, waiting for your total reliance on him. Waiting to lead you in victory. Can you hear him whisper?
The More You Get Involved, The More You Connect, The More You Belong
Kris Swiatocho @ Jul 28, 2010 05:10 AM
The
More You Get Involved, The More You Connect, The More You Belong Last summer, after being gone (traveling in ministry) for about 6 years, I moved back to my home in Garner, NC. I wasn't completely sure what the Lord had in store. The fall was very busy with my tour. In the middle of this great harvest of ministry I would lose my beloved father to Alzheimer's. 2009 would end with joy not only for the lives God used me to minister too but knowing my dad was with the Lord, healed and restored. Upon moving back I had to make some decisions of where to go to church again, what friends and neighbors to call, what places to eat at and shop. I had to find a way to reconnect. Even though, I of all people can connect easily to anyone, its staying connected that is more of a challenge. I decided to start back at my home church. I knew it wasn't that big. I had heard that the singles program dissolved many years back. I knew their idea of a contemporary service was six choir members coming out front and taking their robes off. lol. That the greeting ministry needed some updating not to mention other ministries. Well, I jumped in the best I could without any real commitment. I wanted to just wait and see what God wanted me to do. I quickly joined the greeters. I also rejoined Sunday school. Sunday after Sunday, I would greet. I especially enjoy giving out stickers to the kids again (although most of the ones i remember are all grown now). As each week past I started to notice something, I had reconnected. Kids were looking forward to seeing me to get their sticker and adults were waiting to hear me sing as they walked in, others would give me a sense of peace, knowing they were where God wanted them to be. I would meet new folks, direct them to Sunday school or place beside someone in the pew who would talk to them. Then this past Sunday, I was asked to do a skit off the cuff. Wow, its like the old days. Then last night, I went to a leaders meeting to discuss greeter training for the church. Yes, my church may have some areas of struggle, but the heart is there in the lives of the people there. The more you get involved, the more you connect. The more you connect, the more you belong. And when you belong, you stay, you serve, you tithe, you commit to do the Lords work, forever. Galatians 6:10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries YesMarketingandDesign.com BellaJewelryDesigns.org NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
God Uses It All For His Purpose
Kris Swiatocho @ Jul 21, 2010 12:30 AM
God
Uses It All For His Purpose This past May I was helping my mom get her house ready to put on the market. It required a lot of physical labor. From cutting down trees, raking, putting out mulch, to painting the inside, rebuilding a bathroom, etc. the work seem to never end. Every night I went to bed hurting from my head to my toes. Well, I guess during one of those 20 trips to the dump to using the hammer to knocking down old tile in the bathroom to carrying (6) 50lb bags of rocks to the backyard, I injured my arm. Sure, at first it was like, "oh well, I am getting old." Then, when I returned back to my home in Garner, the pain didn't seem to go away. I iced it, heated it, motrined it, held it, and then decided I need to doctor it but with a real one. The doctor took xrays, push and mashed, had me raise my arms, etc .and said, "well, I think your rotator cuff has been torn, but, not too bad. I am sending you to physical therapy." I was like, physical therapy? I heard people feel worse when they go there. I heard that you have to exercise or something. Uggg. Well, the next day I was off to my first physical therapy appointment. I had to do all these things for them to figure out what I could and couldn't do with my arm. They assess me as having tendon damage and a slight rotator cuff tear. It would take 4 weeks of physical therapy, icing, exercises and patience. Well, just so you know, they do hurt you at therapy. I left feeling worse then when I walk in but, I am seeing the results of the pain. Yes, I am seeing the results of the pain. On top of this, I have been able to witness to 7 people. You see, God uses all things, even our injuries, even our pain to bring healing. Healing not only to ourselves but to the lives we encounter. Proverbs 16:24 Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries YesMarketingandDesign.com BellaJewelryDesigns.org NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
Looks Can Be Deceiving...Same with Singles
Kris Swiatocho @ Jul 5, 2010 05:12 PM
 Last weekend I was at a cookout when I saw what I thought was a bumblebee buzzing next to us. I am personally not afraid of bumblebees, as I have seen them many times around my yellow jasmine. However, everyone else appeared scared and wanted to move away. Then out of nowhere, one of my friends came over and grabbed the bee in his hand. We were like, what? Aren't you afraid of being stung? Nope, he said. We were like why? He said, because it’s not a bee. What? It's not a bee. It looks like a bee, it’s flying like a bee, its buzzing like bee. He said, yes, from a distance it does look like a bee but if you ever saw one up close you would know its not. It’s a bumbee moth. God had made this insect to look like a bee to keep predators away. How cool is that? And only those who know the truth (who have been close enough) know what is really is and as a result, not afraid. Not afraid to get close, not afraid to touch.
As a single in some churches I have felt like the bumblebee moth. People
make all kinds of assumptions about me without knowing me, without
getting close to me. They assume I am there to take their husbands away,
start dating everyone, take from the church or bring drama to the
church. Perhaps God has protected me by being single. Perhaps he has
allowed my life situation to be used by Him. But until the church and
its people take the time to get closer, to see that singles are just
like them, that we are loved and cared for by the same Father, they will
stay away and be afraid. They will assume the worse without knowing the
truth. God has called us all to come to Him,
to be in a relationship with Him and to be used by Him. Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
Don't Squash Him, He's Praying
Kris Swiatocho @ Jun 29, 2010 07:12 PM
I don't want to pray is something you never hear the "praying mantis"
say. Last Sunday at church, in one of the windows in the foyer, was a
praying mantis. Now I don't see many praying mantis'. So it wild to not
only see it but watch it. He pretty much stayed in the same position
for at least 2 hours (I greeted at my church for 2 services). His head
moved occasionally and his eyes but the rest just stayed in that
"praying" position. After I got home from church, I continued to think about that insect. I decided to look up more information and discovered some interesting facts. A praying mantis can turn its head 360 degrees. Their eyes can also move all over the place without actually having to turn their head. They are considering a predatory insect in that they wait for something they want to eat to come close, then pounce on it. They got their name from the "prayer-like" stance of their upper arms. Their Greek name is a form of the work "prophet". I was like, wow...this is way too cool. Hmm, they look like they are praying and their Greek name means prophet. I wonder what I look like when people look at me? What is my name in the Lord? When people see me to do they see a servant of Christ? Does my attitude and behavior reflect Christ? If people described me, would they use words like prophet, prayer warrior or solider for Christ? You know what is so great about God? He can put something so out of place on a Church window seal such as a praying mantis to show you something about HIM. He wants us to be praying, spending time with Him, receiving all that He has to offer. So in turn, we become that prophet, sharing all that Christ has done for us with others. And sometimes this means you might have to move. Are you a praying mantis or just a bug? PS Happy 4th Psalm 17:6 I call on you, O God, for you will answer me; give ear to me and hear my prayer. Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
Before You/They Marry
Kris Swiatocho @ Jun 25, 2010 09:31 PM
BEFORE YOU MARRY In your ministry you will have couples dating, sometimes to each other and sometimes outside the church. Although you can’t always have control of who they date, their maturity, what they are doing while they are dating, etc., you can have some control when comes time to marry them (or see them get married). In today’s culture we are seeing more and more co-habitating couples, single parents, and those divorced multiple times. Trying to help couples make the right decision for marriage (first and second or more) has become more complex than ever. Now your church may already have some guidelines when it comes to marrying couples such as pre-marriage counseling but let me also suggest that you have your couples (while they are still dating prior to their engagement) read/conduct a bible study together such as “Before You Say I Do” workbook by H. Norman Wright. The reason I suggest this is that most couples once engaged their brains leave their bodies. You can counsel to the cows come home and even if you suggest they wait, they won’t wait. They will just find another church. Now don’t get me wrong, there are some that will wait, if that is your suggestion (depends on their maturity of the couple). But most pre-marital counseling to me is almost a waste. By the time they are engaged they are in the “feel good love phase” and not really thinking seriously about what they are doing. I have given out more “Before You Say I Do” workbooks to couples than I can count. What is so great is that some will bring the workbook back to me in a week and say, “we found out we aren’t ready.” Some will get half-way through and then tell me that one or the other left the relationship due to finding out they were compatible or that they were at two separate places in regard to the Lord. But some have actually finished the workbook and felt the Lord leading towards the next step of engagement and then marriage. I say all this as my own way of saving the marriage of the future. The more we can do on this end as leaders and pastors of singles, the higher the chance the marriage they will stay together for a life-time. We can help them to set the foundation now for the future. Note: In the last church I was on staff I had a couple that like to counsel singles that wanted to date but were not in a relationship. Yet again, another step towards helping singles become the right person before they find the right person. -- Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com (Silent Shopper, Greeting, First Impression Ministry) Yes! Marketing and Design Services 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
Special Way To Honor Singles Leaders
Kris Swiatocho @ Jun 24, 2010 08:43 PM
I have started and led many singles groups over the years. The most important part of your single ministry is your leaders. As you lead them they will lead others. Teach your leaders to fish and they will in turn teach others the same. So the importance of loving, caring, teaching, etc. your leaders are vital not to mention teaching them how to lead. But to take your pastoring/leadership of them to the next level I like to do something special. Beside the basics of calling, praying, encouraging, and listening to my leaders, I try and find out the one thing that motivates them and then do it. For some leaders it’s a pat on the back, letting them know they are doing a great job followed-up by a gift certificate to their favorite restaurant. For another its fresh flowers delivered to them at work. Maybe its tickets for them and friends to the movies or local baseball game. Maybe it’s a gas card so they can take a day trip away from work. Maybe it’s a book from their favorite author. Well, I am sure you get the idea. You won't believe how special it will be when you give them something that was just for them (and unique to them). Something that says, you are very valuable to this ministry and me. So when should you do this and how often, well that is up to you. The point is that its special and above the normal encouragements, phone calls, emails, etc. You don't want to do it so much they expect it but instead be creative of what you do and when. Keep it private* between the two of you (this is specially good in that some gifts may have cost more than others and we don't want leaders comparing). Oh and one more thing; I love to treat my leaders to lunch, coffee, dinner at my house, etc. I also like to treat the whole group occasionally (moving my leaders meeting to a ice cream shop). Also, once a year I like to treat them to leadership retreat and/or special dinner of thanks (I sometimes get marrieds to serve). *Not private in that your boss/pastor doesn't know or a co-leader. We wouldn't want anything taken wrong. So, start thinking of today how you can give that extra special gift to those that are leading your ministry. Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com (Silent Shopper, Greeting, First Impression Ministry) Yes! Marketing and Design Services 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10 Singles That Don't Fit in Traditional Sunday School Classes
Kris Swiatocho @ Jun 24, 2010 06:48 PM
This past year as I have traveled I have a conversation of more than one time in regards to what do you do with singles who are not ready for a singles small group or Sunday school class. What about people who are separated, hurting, in counseling, divorced (but still struggling), etc. What do you do with those who you know aren't ready for your ministry but at the same time, they don't' fit in traditional small groups or Sunday school classes. A couple of years ago I worked with a church in Abilene, TX. They had singles small groups/classes to fit all ages. They also had a "transitions" class. What's a transitions class you ask? It's a class to help people in transition, those not ready for a regular class. Types of people in a transition class: 1. Separated: We always want to encourage separated people to get back with their spouses. Sometimes putting them in with singles can actually discourage this. This is also a time they could attend a divorce recovery ministry class. A transitions class will help them make the new life change. 2. Divorced: Those that are newly divorced are still sometimes not ready to be with other singles. Divorce recovery doesn't happen with one 12 week course but in some cases years. Again, people need time to find out what went wrong with their marriages, to heal, reconcile, etc. A transition class will help them as everyone in the class is in transition of some kind. 3. Grieving: When you have a loss in your life you might not be quite ready to hang with a large group or attend events. A transitions class allows more time to heal and adjust. 4. New to area: When we are new to the church/area, we sometimes don't know what class we want to be in. A transition class allows them to get to know people in the church while visiting other classes to see where they fit in best. 5. Life changes: Any life change can be dramatic—from a job change to parent moving in, etc. Sometimes people just need time to find out where they need to be. Guidelines: 1. Decide whether its going to be singles or marrieds or mixed (male/female). 2. Keep the group small. 3. Encourage them to be visiting other classes so they can eventually leave. 4. Make a decision of how long they can stay, 6 months, 1 year, etc. again, the point is a transition not to stay. 5. Offer support in what area of life they need help in. Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com (Silent Shopper, Greeting, First Impression Ministry) Yes! Marketing and Design Services 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
Singles Have the Best Fellowship
Kris Swiatocho @ Jun 23, 2010 12:37 AM
Recently I spent some time with two friends (on separate days) who got married about a year ago. During the conversation, both of them shared with me how they missed the fellowship of their single friends. That even though they didn't miss the drama of their friends they did miss the connections. They knew their marriage was God ordained/led and they had no regrets, however, like in all things you don't know what you have until its gone. I started to think about what they said. There is so many of us that are desperate to get married. Between E-harmony and Match.com, to bars, church, friends, and even Walmart, we are on this exhausted hunt for a spouse, While in pursuit though, we don't think about what we are going to give up. Sure, marriage can be wonderful, but the reality is things will change. Some things change for the better and some for the worse. Until I had heard it from my friends mouths, I had never really thought of the fellowship they had given up. It wasn't that they planned to give it up or wished it away, it just stopped. Maybe it was the other priorities that were in their lives now, or maybe being a wife made it awkward to hang with the singles guys again or vice versa, maybe one didn't want to be without the other, etc. When you are single (especially if you have a very involved singles group), you do run into friends at Walmart sparking a conversation that can last for hours in the parking lot. You do text each other to meet at the local coffee shop only to find other single friends already there. You do sit and listen to each others problems, sharing suggestions and prayer. When you are single, your community, your family is each other. This should not be taken too lightly. So for those of you wishing to be married as soon as possible (and for those counseling/leading singles), don't let them forget what they have by being single. Cherish where God has you til he moves you elsewhere. Value the friendships and connections you have now as more than likely they will change. As far as my friends, they are slowly learning new ways to find fellowship. It's a little more difficult as you have to find couples verse singles but they are up to the challenge. It's not that they haven't kept some single friends now that they are married, its just the relationships have had to change. Even though them miss some of the old connections, God is providing new ways. Ecclesiastes 4:10 If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
Being Alone Is All In How You Look At It
Kris Swiatocho @ Jun 7, 2010 07:27 PM
A month or so back, I had the pleasure of going with my mom to see a butterfly release in honor of all of those who had died this past year while in the care of hospice. The ceremony was outside near the ocean. You could feel the warmth of the sunshine while the waves were crashing down. Various speakers got up to speak and share a little about hospice. Then a pastor got up and spoke a few words. Then the speakers took turns reading the names of all those who had died. My mom and I held hands as they got closer to my dad's name. Then, he said it "Henry Davis." My mom clasped my hand tighter as she started to cry. A bittersweet time in that it reminded her that she was now alone but at the same time, she wasn't. As an adult, I have never known any life but singleness. Now, my mom for the past year has been living the same life. She says the nights are the worse, not having my dad next to her. I can only give her a hug and let her know that even though I know its not the same, I am here. God would remind her that my dad will always be here in her memories. That afternoon when they released the butterflies, one came and landed on my mom's arm. No, it wouldn't be my dad for he is with the Lord but you know, God has His ways of comforting the lonely, whether single or married. Sometimes its a butterfly in honor of someone you lost to a familiar smell of cookies that your grandmother use to make to a hug from someone that loves you. As a single, God has reminded me that He puts all kinds of people in my life to love and care for me. Maybe I want something more but God assures me He has given me want I need. Thank you Lord for butterflies. Psalm 119:76 May your unfailing love be my comfort, according to your promise to your servant. Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
My Tongue Was Red
Kris Swiatocho @ May 21, 2010 09:20 AM
Yesterday I flew from NC to OK for a singles conference. I
am used to flying, as it’s apart of my work. Like most of us feel, flying can
be a good experience or a bad one. Depending on the traffic getting to the
airport, the hassle of getting your bags checked (and paying that extra unfair
fee), the other hassle of security (what do you mean I can't take my coral pink
lip gloss because its not in a zip-lock bag) to walking a mile to your gate or
the other zillion possible issues, sometimes you would just prefer to drive,
well if you could. Well this trip would not leave me disappointed. My ride
would run late to picking me up but hey, I was cool, I told her to come earlier
than normal anticipating this might happen. I pre-weighed my large suitcase and
was at 46.5 lbs, right under the 50lb mark (hey, I fly a lot and just know from
lifting my own bags now). Again, preventing a possible scene of trying to find
a place in my purse to move my 10 pairs of shoes too. I got through security
without the normal hitches of, boy, you have a lot of jewelry in the bag, we
need to take a better look (hey, I like to be fashionable..I never know what
might match better). And for the first time, my gate wasn't as far as usual. Then it happened, the dreaded "we have to put a pink
tag on your small, tiny, microscopic suitcase as this plane is very small and
it won't fit overhead, it will have to go under the plane." I said, it
wont fit, what do you mean it won't fit (first bite of my tongue)? I called ahead of time and got this
tiny bag cleared (another bite).
It has to go on the plane with me, it's like a big purse. It has all my
valuables in it. "Mam, you will have to transfer all your valuables to
your person, the bag can not go, it has to go under the plane." I am
thinking, transfer all my valuables..that would be everything. And how and
where was I supposed to transfer these valuables into..my person? (another
bite). You should have seen me trying to stuff everything in my purse. I stuff my jewelry boxes,
my camera, my medicine, my phone items, and carried my laptop in my hands. But
I could not fit my CD's. My easily breakable. CD's. They would have to stay in
my tiny suitcase. When I got to next location (Memphis), they gave me back my
suitcase plane side. I opened it up to see my CD's thrown everywhere with two
of the cases broken. I quickly went up to the next set of airplane personnel
and said I simply have to take this suitcase on the plane next time. I shared
with them my situation, my phone calls ahead of time, and my crack CD's. Again,
I was told the same information. I said, do you at least have a fragile sticker
to put on my tiny pink suitcase. "Mam, we do not have a sticker, you will
have to transfer the CD's to your person" (now my tongue is starting to
bleed). Does it look like I have a
place to put my CD's (ok, that one slipped)? Well, things only got worse from that point. From
misinformed stewards to personnel, everyone had an opinion of what I could do
with my little pink suitcase. Some said I cold take it and others said no. I
did get another bag to move my CD's into but by now, my witness has surely been
affected. I didn't lose my temper but put it this way, if after an incident you
don't want to tell anyone you are in ministry, this means you lost your
witness. LOL. Well, I wish I could say I found peace once I got on the
plane but as I made it to my seat, I continued to grumble about how unfair
Delta was, their stupid inconsistent rules, the steward, etc. God would then
start to chuckle as He wasn't through with me yet. He put a 2 year old child
behind me in the seat that for the next 1.5 hours kicked my seat, put the tray
up and down, the window shade up and down and played with her cup of ice. No
matter how loud my put my music on my headphones the continuous kicking was
overly annoying. Each kick, noise,
etc. I would have to continue to bite my tongue as I knew there was nothing the
mother could really do to change things. This is when the great revelation hit, we simply can not
always change our circumstances but we can surely change our own attitude in
regards to them. So you know what, if you are going to live this life (whether you fly or
drive), there will always be things that will annoy you, try your patience,
frustrate and even test your tongue. But, if you remember, this too shall pass
and maybe, just maybe, you can still witness to others while you are in it. And
by the way, what is my "person?" Psalm 57: 1 Have mercy on me, O God,
have mercy on me, for in you my soul takes refuge. I will take refuge in the shadow of your wings until the
disaster has passed. Kris Swiatocho,
Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com (Silent Shopper, Greeting, First Impression
Ministry) Yes! Marketing and Design Services 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come
to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
I Don't Need a Stinken Man....
Kris Swiatocho @ May 17, 2010 10:56 PM
As some of you know I have been helping my mom with some
upgrades to her home. One of the many projects is tearing down her
bathroom so that my brother can build a new one. I can honestly tell you
I have never worked so hard in my life. My first step was to continue to take down wallpaper, the backing and the 2nd backing. lol. Then on towards the sink, cabinets and toilet. "Hey, I don't need no stinken man to help me," I said to myself. I am strong enough to tear this stuff out. After removing tons of screws, nails and glue, I was able to rip it all out. Whew! That was hard but thank you Lord it's done. Nothing could be this hard again. Wow, was I ever wrong. My next step was the tile (as my mom continued on removing the wallpaper). "OK, no problem, I will just use this crowbar type thing and lift the first tile off. It should be pretty easy, " I said to myself. Well, two-days later, hundreds of hammer hits, sweat, tears and frustration, tile and backing flying everywhere, the wall of tile is down. Then it was off to the floor of tile. Another day later, it was up as well but not after suffering knee cuts, and a horrible back ache. We loaded all the tile up on the truck (a large trashcan full of old tile plus 6 trash bags and a tarp with large pieces of wall and floor) and proceeded to the dump. I started praying asking for help to unload. Because every muscle in my body was hurting and I wasn't sure how I could unload this tile. Then out of no where a man drove up and said, "hey, need some help?" I was like, "yea!" He proceeded to say he wasn't in a hurry and so he had time to help. What a message for me. When I am not in such a hurry in life, a panic, I am able to not only hear from God but also able to act on what I hear. And you know, I did need a stinken man. Proverbs 8:33 Listen
to my instruction and be wise; do not ignore it. -- Kris Swiatocho, Director TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries NavigateConference.com FromHisHands.com (Silent Shopper, Greeting, First Impression Ministry) Yes! Marketing and Design Services 919.434.3611 2664 Timber Drive, Suite 307, Garner, NC 27529 The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give life to its fullest. John 10:10
One Smelly Old Jeep
Kris Swiatocho @ May 9, 2010 11:45 PM
 Thank You Lord That You Look
On The InsideRecently I have been helping my mom with some much needed yard work. For three days I raked up leaves, pine-straw and limbs into a trash can and then loaded into my dad's old jeep truck to take it to the landfill. Now the picture you see here is not our truck but one I found on the Internet. Our truck, well, let's just say it needs a lot of work. The outside has dings and scratches, not to mention the paint has faded. The doors squeak and crack as you open them. The inside of the cab is dirty and smells horrible. Who knows what's been left in it all these years. The fabric on the roof the cab is missing, exposing old dingy insulation. The air conditioner is broke but hey, the radio works. The back window is supposed to open but doesn't. You have to start the engine without stepping on the gas. And the most important rule is you can't drive it over 55mph. Not because it can't but because my dad never did. Upon another recent trip to the landfill I told my mom that dad's truck was horrible. That is it stunk and was nasty inside. She quickly responded and said "well, it runs great." The inside is in awesome shape and that is all that really matters. I was like, hmmm. I need to take a lesson from my dad's old jeep. Yea, the outside is not looking that great anymore. It's starting to show its age, just like me. You can see some of where it's been by the body damage. You can see neglect in its life, just like with me. You can also see what is broken. Some can be fixed while others can not. But you know, I am thankful that even though my outside is falling apart, my inside is made new each day. And that is what Christ is looking at. Thank you Lord for looking on the inside and for this valuable lesson you showed me in an old smelly truck. 1 Samuel 16:7 But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." |