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| October 30, 2007 |
I can't ever remember not believing in God. I can remember having some doubt as to scripture and the accounts of the life, death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.
It's hard to explain because in my heart, I really wanted to believe and had even convinced myself that I did believe, but my head had doubts.
I had doubts if the historical Jesus Christ ever really lived. If he was not flesh and bone, who could he have died, and if he didn't die, how could he have been risen from the dead? Then, my heart would take over and try to convince my head that Jesus did in fact live.
To be honest, much of my life this was not a struggle. I pretty much, around age 16, put such questions out of my head and went on with my life. I was a very convenience oriented Christian and that is being quite kind. For the most part, I was not walking with Christ, I was definitely not talking with Him, and I pretty much just didn't spent any time thinking about Him.
I remember with clarity the moment I lost all doubt and started believing. We had been attending EBC for about 6 months or so and I was reading my Bible. It was just before Easter and I was reading about Jesus' return to Jerusalem. Today, we celebrate it as Palm Sunday. When Jesus was riding into town on a donkey and the people laid palm leaves down in front of him.
I do not know what it was about that scene, but I could visualize it as if it were happening right in front of me. It was total chaos. People pushing to get to the front to see Him. A woman who had a health problem (prolonged bleeding) desperately trying to touch His robe, cheering, yelling and dust all around.
While all of this was happening, He noticed the woman who had touched his robe and He healed her. All of this chaos going on around Him. He knew what was ahead, and He healed this poor desperate woman who had enough faith to push herself to the front of the line and touch Him.
Did it really happen like that? I think it did. He shared with me a mental picture of the scene in a way that made me absolutely sure that it really happened.
From that moment on, I've never doubted. You see, once you believe that Jesus is real, then you have two choices. Choice 1) all of the Bible is factual and Jesus Christ is the son of God who came to die for my sins. He died on the cross, was buried, and was raised from the dead. This choice is to have faith that everything in scripture is 100% true and Jesus is who he says he is. 2) the second choice is everything in the Bible is a lie. That Jesus either never lived at all or, if he did live, he was a madman who thought he was God.
You see, there is no middle ground. Jesus is the son of God, or it's all a lie.
Nearly 10 years ago, Jesus laid those options in front of me. He used His word and the description of His return to Jerusalem to paint a picture for me. He allowed me to sense the scene as it unfolded. Forever, he burned in my heart and mind the knowledge that He is not a lie, that it all happened just as we have read, and that He is who he claims to be, the risen son of God.
To quote Thomas, "My Lord and my God".
I've learned that the hardest part about having faith is just having faith. Once you believe and believe unconditionally (like a child), having faith in His promise and in His word becomes very easy.
Yes, I still have moments of doubt, but never again doubt that He is the truth and that He is my Lord and my God. My doubts are more around my own inadequacies but I no longer doubt Him.
Jeff
| October 24, 2007 |
It seems to me that most significant changes in Human History have been accomplished by small groups of dedicated people. As it relates to the Church and Christianity, I see the same thing.
Moses - Here we have a young man and his brother, a very small group). Moses was not a good speaker (perhaps a speech disability, or maybe just a shy stutter, Scripture is not very specific). God called on Moses to free His people from bondage in
Joshua, with a relatively small army, defeated nations. Again, a small group of dedicated people following God's will changed the world.
The greatest change in all of human history was brought about by Jesus Christ. Jesus, with a group of 12 men changed the world forever. How did they do this? A small group of dedicated people were following Jesus and listening to the will of God. Think about it, 12 men changed the entire course of history.
Another common thread, with the exception of Jesus, all of them were flawed. Some were flawed in serious ways. Moses was a murderer and initially scared. Peter was a hot head who tried to cut off a man's head and ultimately denied even knowing Christ. Joshua failed to follow God's orders.
I think a lot of us (I am guilty as charged here) think we have too many skeletons in our closet to jump out in faith or there are things that are not perfect in our lives. We're afraid of the unknown and afraid of failure. We're afraid our friends may not approve of the changes God has asked us to make (think people didn't laugh at Noah? Hey, Noah, what you building? A boat? You're miles away from water you crazy old man. Poor old Noah, he must have lost his mind).
We're afraid to take the personal risk that others may not see the vision or approve. Wasn't that Jonah's problem? Sometimes we’re afraid people will laugh at us or get angry with us.
However, if the leading is really from God, all he asks of us is to have the faith to step out of the boat and keep our eyes on Him. If we take the first step and keep our focus on Him, God will handle the rest. And, yes, some will not like it (Think the leaders of the day liked what Jesus had to say?). Some will strongly disagree (The Roman authorities were not terribly happy with Paul). Doing the right thing may even cost you some friends (Jesus made this quite clear to His disciples),
So, where am I going with all of this? Honestly, I'm not sure. I'm more thinking out loud and it helps to write these thoughts down so that I can verbalize them more effectively when the time is right.
I see changes that need to be made around me. God has pointed these out to me. I’m afraid to step out of the boat. I’m afraid that I will be seen as rocking the boat. I’m afraid that I will lose friends. I’m afraid my views may be seen as too far out of the mainstream. I’m afraid people are not ready or willing to change. Mostly, I’m afraid I do not have the faith needed to make that step.
Bottom-line, what I need to tell myself is:
1) don't be afraid that your group is too small. God makes an army of any size group following His will.
2) don't be afraid to step out. No reward comes without risk. God promises the reward. He does not guarantee a risk free ride.
3) If God has shown something to you that needs to be changed, change it. He would not have pointed it out to you. He made you aware of these things for a reason and He’s asking you to start the change. (Moses is a very good example of this).
Now, the next step, I have to read this again and again until I have the faith and the nerve to jump out of the boat and know I won't sink.
That's it for today.
Jeff
| October 18, 2007 |
Something that has been weighing on my heart lately is what seems to be me an air of apathy in our church when it comes to volunteering and serving. I don't know what it is but it seems that we have about 400 people who come to our church every week, but less than 25 percent of those are actively involved in serving. Perhaps I'm wrong and I honestly hope I am. I pray that my observations are clouded and I'm not seeing the full picture. If not, I think there needs to be a revival of the heart among our congregation.
I do not have answers and I do not know any answers but am very open to hearing what others may have to say.
So, some questions to get conversation going>
What to you think is the best attribute of EBC?
What are we doing that is working well?
What do you think are the strengths of EBC?
Is there a crisis of serving in our church?
If so, what do you think is causing it?
If there is a crisis, how would you fix it?
What is the single most important thing you would keep at EBC?
What is the single most important change you would like to see at EBC?
Where do you see EBC in 5 years (what types of ministries, what type of worship services, average age of members, etc)?
Well, that's it for today.
Jeff
| October 7, 2007 |
Well, today it started off all about me. I really was not in the mood to play guitar this morning. I reluctantly practiced and come worship time, I went through the motions. I knew the songs we were playing and pretty much could have played them in my sleep. My mind was a million miles away from church and worship through the first couple songs we played. I went through the mechanics of playing guitar, I hit the right notes at the right time. I'm sure nobody but me really knew that my body was on the stage but my mind and heart were elsewhere.
It's times like these when either God wins or we let Satan win. Far too frequently, Satan wins. The good news is today, God won. I don't know what happened, but right before offering, we were playing the introduction to Heart of Worship. It was quiet and we were playing softly as Krishna said a prayer for the offering. I looked out at the congregation and saw people worshiping and praying. God pointed out to me they are why I'm there. It has nothing to do with me or what I want, but I needed to give my best for Him and for them. I honestly have no idea what Krishna was saying but her voice was very soft and I felt the Holy Spirit energize my body. My guitar came alive and I started playing for Him and not for me.
The lyrics say, in essence, I will bring you more than a song because a song is not what you desire. As I was playing the introduction, watching His people worship Him, it hit me that a song was all I was bringing Him this morning. He opened my heart.
I suppose the reason I'm writing this today is to share with anyone who is reading this to look into your heart whenever you feel you're just going through the motions. If you're heart is not into worship, listen for His voice and draw strength from others who are worshiping.
It is really not about you or what you want or what you need. It is about Him and those around you. If you're just going through the motions, others will sense that and it may prevent someone else from opening their heart to Jesus. If nothing else, it will keep your heart from opening to His message.
He wants and deserves our very best.
'nuff said.
Jeff
| October 3, 2007 |
I’ve been sitting in on the Contagious Christian class. Tonight, we discussed the different styles of witnessing for Christ. I won’t rehash the different styles, but what struck me tonight is how perfect God’s plans really are. He has made all of us different and given us all unique gifts and skills.
Some people excel in a very direct witnessing approach and some are better at sharing their testimony, and others are better at forming relationships and sharing Jesus with people through friendships.
Just like some people are more gifted in one area than another, God has made us all receptive to differing types of message delivery. Stop and think about that for a moment. God has equipped us with what we need to share His message and to receive His message. That’s pretty cool.
When it comes to sharing what God has done in your life, there are no wrong answers. If you think you have no good story to share, you’re wrong. God has given you the perfect story to share. Your story is unlike any other story out there. He has done unique things in your life that He has done for nobody else. There’s nothing too small or too big. So what if your story is not heart wrenching? Who cares if you have not overcome some seemingly insurmountable obstacle? I believe the more “normal” testimonies are just as effective. The reason? Most of us lead normal lives. Most people are not facing the depths of addiction or other insurmountable life problems. Most people lead normal boring average lives.
I know I fit that latter category. When I heard people sharing how God helped them up from the bottom of a pit, I always thought that my life was not a mess and what could God do for me? I was a “nice” person, I believed in God but I was not close to Jesus.
Now that I’ve seen what God can do I have a much different perspective. My life was not bad. I have a beautiful wife, a good job, a nice house in the burbs, a son that would make any dad proud. But to be quite honest, there was something missing. I’m much happier, I like my job more and I love serving in my church.
Then there’s the 50lbs+ that I was able to lose. Faith and trust in God was the key. It’s a discussion for another day. Let’s just say that if one has faith the size of a mustard seed, he can tell a mountain to move and it will. Everyone has mountains. Mine was being seriously overweight. God moved my mountain.
That’s enough for today.
| October 2, 2007 |
Other than a personal hygiene issue, what is dirty feet?
Dirty feet is the initiative our student ministry is making to get involved and serve the church and the community. Jesus was not afraid to "get his feet dirty" and get involved. When it comes to servant hood, Jesus is the ultimate good example.
As stated many times, the mission of EBC is to "Introduce people to Jesus Christ, and develop His followers to Christ like Maturity." Time and time again through the Gospels, we find examples of Jesus serving. There is His example of washing disciples feet, he fed thousands with a single loaf of bread and some fish, He loves us and serves us. He is also quite clear that He demands that we be servants as well. What did He tell Peter upon the reaffirmation of Peter's ministry? "Feed my sheep".
So, in the interest of helping to develop our students to mature followers of Jesus Christ, Nathan and the student team has started an initiative called Dirty Feet. Keep an eye on our young people and you're going to see them serving in various capacities.
I encourage everyone to take a moment and talk to some of these young people. You will be amazed that behind the sometimes scruffy hair, or sloppy dress, there lies the heart of a true servant and follower of Jesus Christ. These kids are awesome and their love for the Lord is genuine.
As old "grey beards" we need to foster their devotion to Jesus. We need to look far beyond outward appearances and, as Jesus does, look into their hearts. You will find these kids are quite mature, they have deep feelings for the Lord, they have deep feelings about serving each other and the community, and they very much want to be accepted for who they are.
Assuming we really want to be Jesus to others, let's start with the teens of our church. Jesus does not care if they comb their hair, He does not care if they're wearing flip-flops, and Jesus does not care if their shirts are tucked in. Jesus cares about what is in their hearts. I'm sure you will find their hearts are good and like Jesus, you're going to love them.
One thing I will caution as you get to know our teens. They're going to make YOU look in the mirror and consider "What am I doing." Quite frankly, from what I've seen of our kids, all of us "adults" can learn a lesson or two from them.
Remember, THEY are the future of not only EBC, but of the Church. Our time of leadership and church activity will pass. These kids, in 10 or 20 years will be the church leaders. They will be committee chairs, they will be Deacons, and some of them will be ministers. Unfortunately, without proper mentoring and guidance, some will drift away from the Lord, while I'm in no position to speak for Jesus, I have to believe watching one of these precious sheep drift away breaks his heart the same as it does mine.
So, please take a moment to get to know one (or more) of these kids. Don't judge their outward appearance or clothing, but listen to their heart. Guide them, mentor them and help to fulfill our church mission of introducing people to Jesus Christ and to developing His followers to Christ like Maturity.
In case you think Jeff may have lost his mind (not a totally unreasonable assumption) please go read Matthew 19:13 and Matthew 19:14.
Random thought for the day.
Jeff